Today we had our first ultrasound, and unfortunately received news that every new parent fears. The doctor says that it doesn’t look like the pregnancy is viable. By this stage, the baby should be developed more and it’s not. The sac should be bigger than it is. When asked what the chances were, he basically said that from his experience there was little chance that this baby would make it.
We cried, prayed, asked why, and are still left wanting. I’m torn by the natural side of me that knows that this baby won’t make it, and the spiritual side of me that says God always has room for a miracle.
As I prayed, I was reminded of Hannah-she prayed that God would open her womb, and He did. When she had her son Samuel, she gave him to the high priest to raise. I’ve come to peace that if this is God’s will, I will release my baby to live with the Highest Priest. I really can’t think of better hands to give him to. As much as it hurts, I know that all the promises God has given me are still true. Our baby is still coming, it just might not be this one.